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| Res Ipsa Loquitur |
Monday, July 18, 2011
Friday, July 8, 2011
a total tool
A lawyer friend of mine recently sent me this awesome Above The Law article: 20 Ways To Write Like a Tool. And the tool in me just hesitated about whether or not the "to" in that title should have been capitalized. The tool in me also cringed at starting a sentence with "and." But I'm getting over it. Ha! Another sentence begun with a conjunction. How do you like me now?!? It turns out, I make fun this concept a lot... so why am I still such a grammar-nazi?
Sitting around the conference table at work today, one of my coworkers was reviewing an intern's work and noticed she had missed the accent mark over CaféWell. My coworker, who (bless his heart) has endured almost three months of my anal retentive, hyper sensitivity to grammar, looked at me sideways and warned our intern, "Don't do that again or she'll put a shock collar around your neck and make you bark like a dog." Awesome. Not really.
Due to my time as a lawyer, I write like a tool. While I'm happy to report that "to the extent" has, in fact, magically drifted out of my vocabulary, I have to admit that I'm guilty of many, if not all, twenty (20) of the atrocities listed in the ATL article. So much so in fact, our intern is undoubtedly losing sleep. Typos are everything in law. And I lost a lot of sleep over typos and potential typos. The last thing I want to do is inflict the same torture I endured on someone else. Especially someone who has to "report" to me. In an effort to not become one of "those" supervisors (or in other words, a "partner at a law firm"), I am going to seriously make an effort to tone down my melodramatic relationship with grammatical errors. Are they ideal? Nope. But the golden rule applies here too... and despite the fact that I effectively had a grammar shock collar around my neck for the last few years, I wouldn't wish my learned neuroses on anyone.
Arf.
Sitting around the conference table at work today, one of my coworkers was reviewing an intern's work and noticed she had missed the accent mark over CaféWell. My coworker, who (bless his heart) has endured almost three months of my anal retentive, hyper sensitivity to grammar, looked at me sideways and warned our intern, "Don't do that again or she'll put a shock collar around your neck and make you bark like a dog." Awesome. Not really.Due to my time as a lawyer, I write like a tool. While I'm happy to report that "to the extent" has, in fact, magically drifted out of my vocabulary, I have to admit that I'm guilty of many, if not all, twenty (20) of the atrocities listed in the ATL article. So much so in fact, our intern is undoubtedly losing sleep. Typos are everything in law. And I lost a lot of sleep over typos and potential typos. The last thing I want to do is inflict the same torture I endured on someone else. Especially someone who has to "report" to me. In an effort to not become one of "those" supervisors (or in other words, a "partner at a law firm"), I am going to seriously make an effort to tone down my melodramatic relationship with grammatical errors. Are they ideal? Nope. But the golden rule applies here too... and despite the fact that I effectively had a grammar shock collar around my neck for the last few years, I wouldn't wish my learned neuroses on anyone.
Arf.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Road Warrior: the learning curve.
As my chocolate lab will tell you, I have been traveling quite a bit lately, and I'm beginning to earn my road warrior stripes... especially after last week's little jaunt over to Albany. I will report on the little tidbits of wisdom I gained through that (questionable) experience and others.
1. Lay longer. Don't pick the flight with the shortest layover time. Even though, on paper, it looks like the most efficient use of your time, you leave the airlines little to no room for error. They're not that good. In fact, they're not good at all. More often than not, you'll end up sprinting to your connection, and, if you're lucky enough to catch it, you'll be the stinky kid on the plane.
2. The flight that cried delay. It is more common to be delayed than to have your flight actually leave on time. HOWEVER, you can't count on this fact when deciding what time to leave for the airport.
3. The board rarely lies. If the flight status board reports that your flight has been delayed 8 hours, it's probably not a typo. Yes, even if the delay is until 1:00 am. If they were going to cancel the flight, they would have canceled it... So get comfortable.
4. Disgusting default. When you book your hotel through Priceline or Expedia, it automatically defaults to a smoking room. YUCK. Even if you know this, if you're checking in super late, there won't be any non-smoking rooms left. Always call the hotel after booking and make sure they get you reserved for a non-smoking room.
5. Rental car. Don't pre-pay for your rental car (Orbitz doesn't require your credit card until you pick up the car... Priceline has your card as soon as you commit to the car). When your flight is incredibly delayed (which, if you haven't picked up on by now... happens A LOT) and you don't get in until after midnight, there's a good chance your rental car company will be closed. You'll end up renting a car with a different company and then spending the next few months arguing with the first company for a refund.
So after my incredibly delayed flight (well into the next morning), the rental car place being closed, and finally making it to the hotel only to be stuck in the smoking room (with BUGS!)... I think it's safe to say I'm earning my RW stripes.
Stay tuned for more lessons and rants from the road... Eat your hear out Kerouac.
1. Lay longer. Don't pick the flight with the shortest layover time. Even though, on paper, it looks like the most efficient use of your time, you leave the airlines little to no room for error. They're not that good. In fact, they're not good at all. More often than not, you'll end up sprinting to your connection, and, if you're lucky enough to catch it, you'll be the stinky kid on the plane.2. The flight that cried delay. It is more common to be delayed than to have your flight actually leave on time. HOWEVER, you can't count on this fact when deciding what time to leave for the airport.
3. The board rarely lies. If the flight status board reports that your flight has been delayed 8 hours, it's probably not a typo. Yes, even if the delay is until 1:00 am. If they were going to cancel the flight, they would have canceled it... So get comfortable.
4. Disgusting default. When you book your hotel through Priceline or Expedia, it automatically defaults to a smoking room. YUCK. Even if you know this, if you're checking in super late, there won't be any non-smoking rooms left. Always call the hotel after booking and make sure they get you reserved for a non-smoking room.
5. Rental car. Don't pre-pay for your rental car (Orbitz doesn't require your credit card until you pick up the car... Priceline has your card as soon as you commit to the car). When your flight is incredibly delayed (which, if you haven't picked up on by now... happens A LOT) and you don't get in until after midnight, there's a good chance your rental car company will be closed. You'll end up renting a car with a different company and then spending the next few months arguing with the first company for a refund.
So after my incredibly delayed flight (well into the next morning), the rental car place being closed, and finally making it to the hotel only to be stuck in the smoking room (with BUGS!)... I think it's safe to say I'm earning my RW stripes.
Stay tuned for more lessons and rants from the road... Eat your hear out Kerouac.
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